Hanging With Chris, my 17 year old son
I am sitting here blogging, responding to blogs and e-mails. I am on the PC in our office and Chris is sitting across from me on the Mac. He is playing World of War Craft. We are listening to his music. So far the choices are Tennacious D, YPPAH, Jimmy Hendrix, The Beattles, etc.
I am aware that my time with him is limited. About 6 months ago we had a serious conversation. I realized that I was really trying to manage him and control his life. He was sitting on the coach in the living room and I sat down with him and we had a great conversation. I had been pushing him to get good grades. I was worried about his choice of friends. He didn’t seem interested in going to college, getting a job or doing better in school. I told him that I wanted so much for him. He is very smart but his grades haven’t shown this for the last 2 years. I was tired of fighting with him, and I just wanted us to get along and I wanted him to have a good life.
He opened up to me, as I started to cry. He said “Mom, you are doing a great job. I just don’t know what I want ot do and I’m having a tough time with school etc”. We hugged. That was the day that I gave up trying to control Chris. I stopped managing him and started trusting that he is a great kid. He is in a transitional period in his life. He is thinking about his future. He’s not just vegging out playing games.
Since then he has gotten a job and opened up a couple of CD’s. He had been very responsible with work. He is working for Taco Time. He is observing people and making choices in his life. He is curious and he will figure everything out in due time.
I feel a sense of freedom. I don’t see him as a project anymore, but a human being with a lot of wonderful qualities that I admire. He is his own man. He doesn’t care what people think. He doesn’t conform. He may take a different path than I would, but it will be his path and that’s okay.
Although I got a late start, I’ve been a serious runner since 1994. I ran my first marathon in 1995 on my 30th Birthday. It’s been my goal to run the Boston Marathon since then. I missed qualifying by 12 minutes that year. I needed to run 3:40 and ran 3:52. Running in the most prestigious marathon, is the ultimate for most runners. The fact that you have to qualify, only fueled my competitive juices.
Over the next 9 years I ran 6 more marathons. I love running so much that I became a 
